Look! Cake!
by My Dad is Mr.Clean
Summary: It's the thought that counts right? RIGHT!  [hints of Tango] HAPPY REALLY LATE BIRTHDAY ATOBE xD Rated T for Niou's potty mouth :D


WOWIEE! I haven't been on this site for like a month...homework kills you..TT-TT

well anyways...I'm sorry for not thanking the people this time around...too much to do...and too many people xDDD I feel so loved

anyways this is a REALLY late birthday fic for Atobe...AT LEAST I WROTE ONE!

This was actually my first EVER PoT fic...brings back so many memories...::sobs::

* * *

It was one of those autumn days where you would curse at the leaves for falling nonstop. Of course our stoic fukubuchou of Rikkai wouldn't do that would he? He was just walking through the falling leaves probably thinking of his idol Yukimura. But his thoughts were interrupted when his phone vibrated.

He opened the phone to see it was Atobe. His boyfriend. The message simply said:

_Genichirou. You do know its Ore-sama's birthday tomorrow right?_

Oh crap. Sanada had completely forgotten. Atobe was not going to be happy...

His phone vibrated yet again. It was another one from Atobe.

_You forgot didn't you?_

Sanada was just standing there like an idiot. He quickly took action. He typed back as fast as he could, which was like a word every two minutes. He had to be so technologically impaired.

'_How did you know?_'

_Because you didn't answer Ore-sama's answer immediately._

Sanada thought it was wise to not answer back. He would have to buy Atobe something quick. But that wasn't a good idea because Niou "borrowed" his money...So he had to think of a new option. So he decided to call up Renji. He should at least know SOMETHING in that brain of his.

"Hello?"

"Renji. It's me."

"Who?"

"...Sanada..."

"Ahh...hello."

"I need your help."

"No. I will not do your homework for you."

"Not that!" Sanada said irritated. "It's about Keigo's birthday tomorrow."

"99 percent chance that you didn't get him a present."

"...Right..."

The line was silent for a while. After about 2 minutes or so, Renji spoke up, "You should try baking him a cake."

"You know I don't cook..."

"You should at least give it a try. It's either that or knitting."

"...I'll take the cake..."

"Tell you what. I'll come over and help you."

"..."

"I'll see you at your house in 20 minutes." And with that the line went dead.

"..."

SANADASHOUSESANADASHOUSESANADASHOUSE

Sanada was apparently turning the kitchen upside down looking for a cookbook. Sadly he couldn't find any. There were many other cookbooks but no pastry cookbooks. Then the doorbell rang. In his hurry to get his head out of the cabinet doors he accidentally rammed his head into the door and the shelf. Cursing he rushed to the front door.

"...You're not Renji."

"Yes I am."

"And you're not Yagyuu."

"How'd you know?!"

"Marui! You ass! You weren't supposed to say that!"

Sanada was about to kill these two imposters. But he didn't. Because what would Yukimura say?

Sanada was trying his best to restrain himself so much that he had a twitching eye, a maniacal glint in his eye, and a lopsided frown/smile.

Through his gritted teeth he said, "Niou...Renji eye's are CLOSED. And Marui, Yagyuu doesn't go around popping bubble gum and he isn't that short."

"How the hell was I supposed to walk around with my eyes closed?" Niou said pulling the wig off.

"...Did the gum really give it away?" Marui said sadly.

"By the way..." Sanada said looking at Niou. "Why didn't YOU dress up Yagyuu and him Renji?"

"Because Renji is for a beginner like Marui."

"I'M NOT A BEGINNER!"

"Yes you are."

"PROVE IT!"

"...This is your first time dressing up..." Niou said looking at Marui if it was the most obvious thing ever.

"..."

Sanada coughed. "Where are the real Renji and Yagyuu?"

"We overheard Renji talking to you, so we snuck over."

"..."

"Let's go in!" Marui said excited. "I wanna try the cake!"

"Do you honestly trust fukubuchou's cooking?"

"...Ahhh..."

"...I don't have any pastry cookbooks..." Sanada said stiffly.

"Well that's what I'm for..." Niou said slyly holding up a book.

"So that's why the detector went off..." Marui said thoughtfully.

"...You STOLE it?!" Sanada said (insert mood of choice here.)

"Fukubuchou...you make it sound like I did a bad thing..." Niou drawled.

"You did!" Sanada said bending a whisk.

"Let's get started shall we?" Marui said quickly.

CAKECAKECAKECAKE

"Okay...the book says to pour it in the pan..." Sanada muttered.

And then the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it." Sanada said setting down the bowl.

"Oh and you make us do the dirty work?" Niou said sarcastically.

Sanada ignored him and went to the door. There was Yagyuu, Renji, and Kirihara at the door.

"Come in, co-" Sanada was cut off.

BOOM!!!

"Holy shit! What the fuck did you do Marui?"

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN ME?! YOU DID IT!" Marui shouted back.

"Oh no..." Sanada said horrified.

Renji being the man of action, took the fire extinguisher and shot it into the kitchen causing Niou and Marui (especially Niou) to get even angrier.

"What the hell?!" Marui yelled.

"Turn that fucking thing off!" Niou shouted.

All the while, Sanada turned pale, Yagyuu did a facepalm, and Kirihara was on the floor laughing.

"Sanada, it looks like someone overdosed on the baking powder."

"See? You DID do it!" Marui said pointing at Niou.

"What?! I put a teaspoon in it like I said!"

"YOU DID IT WITH THIS!" Marui shouted holding up a tablespoon.

"THAT IS A TEASPOON!"

"NO! THIS IS!" Marui shouted back holding up a smaller spoon.

"DOES IT EVEN MATTER?!"

"Guys, guys calm do-" Renji started.

"SHUT UP!"

"..."

We're (I) sorry but we (I) don't really know what happened these 5 minutes. We (technically "I") think that Rikkai's data master lost it and used the fire extinguisher but really we (I) don't know. But we (I) know one thing. They stopped fighting.

CAKECAKECAKECAKE

"Fukubuchou..." Kirihara said crinkling his nose. "What IS this?"

"I think it looks fine."

Everyone including Yagyuu and Renji gave Sanada a "Are-you-seriously-blind?" look.

"There's a FISH HEAD sticking out of it." Marui pointed out.

"It's also glowing green on some parts..." Renji said taking notes.

"Are those dead flies and spiders on the cake?'" Niou (purposely) asked.

"Sanada. I don't mean to be rude bu-"

"OKAY! OKAY. We'll make another cake!"

Niou announced, "Time for cake number 9!" (to keep this story from being this long we skipped many cakes.)

"Do you have to do that with every bad cake we make?" Yagyuu asked.

"Yes."

"It wasn't a question you were supposed to answer Masaharu."

BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH

"Ummm...it LOOKS okay..."

"Whatever. Just put icing over it and its going to look fine." Niou said.

"That's a dishonest thing to do Niou."

"HOLY SHIT WHERE DID YOU COME FROM JACKAL?!" everyone including Yagyuu, Renji, and Sanada yelled.

"The open window." He said pointing at it. "By the way...what's with all the green stuff out there?"

"Oh...fukubuchou's cakes." Kirihara said.

"I'm tired of making bad cakes." Marui said flopping down on the floor.

"Fine, fine...I'LL make one..." Jackal said sighing. The things he had to do for this crazy team. Maybe he should transfer...to Hyoutei...

"You can COOK?" Kirihara asked in an awed voice.

"Jackal! Make me cakes for my birthday!" Marui said jumping onto his back.

"..." Maybe he should really transfer...

CAKECAKECAKECAKECAKE

"Look its not even green or anything!" Kirihara said excitedly.

"Jackal! Teach fukubuchou to cook!" Marui said.

"Like that will help." Niou muttered.

"Masaharu...that wasn't very nice."

"Let's put on the icing now..."

ICINGICINGIGING

"...Niou why are you icing that cake?" Jackal asked suspiciously.

"I'm bored." Niou said absentmindedly.

"Okay...but make sure you don't give that one to fukubuchou."

"Whatever."

Jackal sighed.

CAKECAKECAKECAKE

"It's finally Keigo's birthday today..." Sanada said turning to Jackal he said, "Thank you for making the cake."

"Oh. It's nothing really..." Jackal said modestly.

"I'll see you at practice." Sanada said nodding.

HOSPITALHOSPITAL

Yukimura was on the hospital bed looking out the window when suddenly a flower on his bedside table died. Startled, Yukimura stared at it then said to himself, "My Genichirou-is-going-to-be-screwed-today-senses are tingling..." Yukimura paused then looked back outside the window.

"Genichirou. Becareful."

LALALALALALALA

Just as everybody start to walk to practice, Jackal's phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Jackal..." Sanada said erreily quiet.

"Fukubuchou...are you okay?"

"Who else was in the kitchen with the cake?"

"Ummm...Niou. Why?"

By now everyone was staring at Niou.

"ORE-SAMA DOES NOT APPRE-"

Now everyone understood.

"Niou...What did you do with the other cake?" Marui asked.

"I threw it out the window cause I thought it was the bad one..."

"ORE-SAMA IS GOING TO BREAK UP WITH YOU!" the phone screamed.

"KEIGO! IT'S THE THOUGHT THAT COUNTS RIGHT?! YOU JUST SAID THAT 5 MINUTES AGO!"

"UNTIL ORE-SAMA FOUND OUT THAT IT WAS HORRIBLE, DISGUSTING, AND REPULSIVE!"

"DOES IT LOOK LIKE I CAN COOK?!"

"YOU NEVER KNOW RIGHT?!" the phone screamed.

"...Tell Niou that he's screwed when I see him..." and the phone went dead.

"Ah well...tell fukubuchou that I skipped practice today!" Niou said hurrying away.

Renji grabbed him and dragged him into the clubhouse and locked him in. "I'll tell Genichirou that you're in here." And he walked off.

"..."

"...Did you just see what I just saw?" Kirihara asked rubbing his eyes.

"Anyone want to transfer to Hyoutei with me?" Jackal asked apprehensively.

"Sign us up." Marui, Kirihara, and Yagyuu chorused.


End file.
